Our life is perfect.
There, I said it.
Now before you give me that look, or dismissively click this article closed, hear me out.
There’s something that’s been bugging me since December. A friend of mine commented on facebook about a Christmas card she’d received that “made her sick”. The card was of a happy, smiling, perfect family. It disgusted her because she thought it was fakey. I don’t actually think she was talking about us (in fact, I’m not sure I sent a card to her), but it was the thought that got to me. Not that she was being jealous or mean, but that she truly didn’t think that kind of happiness was possible. Life is full of imperfection, I totally get it. There are hundreds of blog posts and articles floating around lately that are practically screaming that it’s okay to not be perfect and that it’s courageous to admit that we’re not. And I agree. I even wrote my own article about struggles with expectations and a cold reality. We were in the depths of new parent hell. Sleep deprived, overwhelmed, and disconnected from each other. We felt alone, scared, frustrated. We had some hard times. But we made it through.
Aside from actual hardship, I think we let ourselves get caught up in a societal perception of perfection, and the pursuit of an impossible ideal. But you know what? Maybe it IS perfect. And maybe we don’t realize it because we’re not paying attention. Or maybe we don’t accept it because we don’t think we deserve it. Take a look. See the good. Believe it.
Our life? Right now, is pretty fucking perfect. There, I said it again. We feel like us again. Our baby boy is about to turn two, and we are crazy in love with him. Every day he amazes and surprises us. He grows and changes, he learns and questions, and he develops his sense of self and independence a little more. He’s goofy, calculating, and delightful in every way. He brings so much light into our lives. He makes us look up and smile at each other with astonishment and pride. I put my head on Jamie’s shoulder. He squeezes my hand. We made it. We feel like humans again, like partners again. We feel more connected and in love than ever. We appreciate each other in a whole new way, and have a renewed sense of forever. It’s a wondrous feeling of love, security, and happiness.
So excuse me for being unabashedly joyful.
These smiles are real. Kisses, real. These happy Facebook statuses and sweet little instagrams are the truth. These three people are the happiest trio you’ll find.
It’s perfect. And it’s all in the heart. Is my manicure perfect? Nope. Is our house magazine worthy? Never. Are we caught up on our to-do lists? Ha! Good one. But you know what? That stuff doesn’t matter as much. It’s not part of our definition of perfect. Perfect to us is making coffee for each other in the morning. Perfect is reading books together in our son’s room at bedtime. Perfect is pinching each other’s butts when we walk by. Perfect is those shared smiles and memories. Perfect is that tiny little high-five. Perfect is family dinner at our small round table. Perfect is being lazy together. Perfect is being adventurous and spontaneous together. Perfect is laughter. Perfect is gratitude. Perfect is us. Perfect is real.
Right now, our families are healthy. Our friends are hitting milestones and celebrating life alongside and with us. Our careers are successful and we have enough time off to enjoy life. This kind of perfection can be fleeting, and I am hyper aware of that. Life moves quickly, and things can change in an instant. So let’s hold onto these moments, savor them, and share our joys. Cheer and cherish when someone counts their blessings, and cradle each other through trials and failures. It’s all part of life. Highs, lows, heartbreak. Embrace it. All of it. And in the wise words of my father in law, Take Care of Each Other.
Images by our friends Ben + Mindy of Studio 6.23